When God Turns a Page (how putting HOME 1st changes everything)

I have always loved public ministry. No matter the opportunity, I love inspiring women that in Christ, we can ALL have a new day. We can all turn a page.

I love seeing women open their hearts to the love God has for them. It may sound strange, but I feel relieved when they come forward and cry at the altar, sit down with me in my office, or reach out for prayer, because that means they are seeking healing, opening their hearts, turning a new page, and wanting to start a new chapter.  

Maybe I love this so much because I was that young woman who needed someone to reach out to her and say, God sees you. You are not alone.

Most of you know I never set out to be in ministry. I just made myself available. Accompanied by one incredible woman after another, I went from venue to venue in awe at how powerful our stories can be. I fell in love with teaching the Bible that dramatically changed my life, and fell more in awe with watching it change others.

But like any of us, I have fallen. I have made mistakes. I have struggled. A handful of years back, my soul was holding very little “living water.” If someone close to me were to take a drink at the wrong moment, what I had to offer might taste bitter. You could say my cup was poisoned by lies, brimming with anxiety and fear.

I was able to lead others to Jesus outside the home, but at Home, I couldn’t seem to be His minister.

Feeling like I was failing at my marriage and failing as a mother, I often acted out of anger. Then I labeled myself a failure and sometimes even felt completely useless to my family. Desperate for reprieve, I battled for peace and joy on a daily basis. I fought with everything I had.

There are times we all feel anxious, grieved, depressed, unheard; none of us are immune. We know what it feels like to question our value. We know how it feels to fight for our worth. Sometimes quitting seems like a viable option, but deep down we know it’s not.

As for me, I dug in my heels, focused on the people and things that mattered most, and prayed for the page to turn.

They say that Home is where the heart is. And for me, that couldn’t be more true. For the past several years, outside of ministry, I’ve focused on nurturing our marriage, raising three children in this crazy world we’re in, and coming to understand how to be an example for Christ within the walls where we live. And every single minute has been worth it.

I’m pretty darn ecstatic to tell you now that our marriage has never been stronger. The love Shane and I share is second to none. We have a bond that we’ve created through unconditional love, understanding, and grace (which we both need a lot of . . . LOL). Just as wonderful, our relationship with our kids is better than ever, and we are proud of the people they are.

In the middle of our trials, I re-learned how to rely on God as our Provider, Redeemer, and example of the true meaning of Love.

Every trial contains treasures meant to be discovered. Whatever you are facing today, first you must believe that God has a plan — and that He will turn your story around for the good. Be faithful and watchful and count those blessings day by day — knowing that He is good — and when it’s time, the page will turn.

As for us, we’ve turned our own page.  Even when we fell, even when it was hard, even when we struggled, we know we were blessed. And through it all, God has showered our family, our marriage, and ministry with love, grace, and provision. 

Many of you have been on this journey with us for a long time. Thank you for your faithfulness. Thank you for your prayers. Thank you for your steadfast love.

(With lots of help from Shane!)

Always,

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2 Response to “When God Turns a Page (how putting HOME 1st changes everything)

  1. May God bless you and your family even more because God used you this morning to help me, to remind me of God’s blessings and care in my own life. Thank you.

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